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Friday, April 15, 2005
Today’s episode was directed by Habib Azar and written by Melissa Salmons.
Transcripts from TVMegasite Henry: Bubbles, this consult here, it's not -- we -- we talked about kids in passing, but -- Katie: No. I am walking out of here with birth control. Not a thermometer and a mission. You can exhale now. Henry: Thank you. Katie: Deciding when and if we want to have kids is huge. You think that I would do that without you? Henry: I guess not. Katie: No. That's why I'm here. I am not letting us get taken by surprise like -- sometimes happens. Henry: Like Jennifer, who we don't even know if she is pregnant, and we will wait to hear from herself, if she chooses to tell us anything. Right? Right? Katie: Right. Henry: Okay. Katie: Unless fate drops the answers in our laps.
Katie: Tell me that isn't fate. Henry: It's confidential information. Katie: It's the trifecta. Henry: Katie. Henry: Katie. Katie: Don't nag. Henry: I'm not. Nurse at nine o'clock. Well? Katie: I thought you didn't want to know. Henry: Well, I didn't, until you knew. Katie: Jennifer's file is in there. She's been to see dr. Schiller recently. I think she's pregnant. Henry: Or she needed birth control. Katie: She went to the family planning center, Henry. Henry: So? Katie: So, why would she go to both? I mean, if she was just having a check-up or getting birth control pills, then she would just come here. But she didn't. She came here, and then she went to the family planning center. Henry: She said she was meeting a friend at the clinic. Katie: No. She went there to get something that she couldn't get here. Henry: Or she was meeting a friend. Katie: Well, why do we even have to wonder? The answer's right there. Henry: Why? Wait a second, why -- whatever happened to letting this just be Mike and Jennifer's business? Katie: Fate happened, about five files from the top. Don't you always say that information is power? Henry: No, no, no. I said that information is the power to blackmail. Now, can you foresee any scenario in which either you or I will blackmail either Mike or Jennifer? Katie: Not off the top of my head. Henry: Okay, then let it go. All right? You go into that file now, you're nothing but a snoop. Katie: I suppose. Henry: Why are you so caught up in this? Katie: I don't know. I guess I'm just trying to be a friend to Jennifer. And I thought that's where we were headed, especially after she told Mike that she slept with Craig. Let's face it, Henry. She could use a friend right now. Henry: Yeah. Well, know what? Going through her private medical file is not a way to win her trust. Katie: I know. I guess I just keep thinking how hard it must be to be in her shoes and making these decisions. Do you have the baby? Is this the right time? Is the father okay with it? Henry: Oh, well, you know Mike. He's a prince. Katie: If -- Henry: No ifs. He's a prince. Katie: Henry, you forget that we already talked about the unfortunate possibility that this baby might be Craig's. Henry: How could you wish that man a father on anyone? Katie? Katie: You know, not long ago, people could have talked about me like that. Or about you. And they probably did. And we probably deserved it. Henry: We -- no. We were never that bad, and you know it. Katie: Well, we could've been, if we didn't have somebody on our side. But we did. Sometimes it was Margo. Or sometimes it was you for me. And it was me for you. We had somebody to help us feel good. Somebody that gives us a chance. Henry: Craig is not some stray puppy that you have to protect. He has been given more second chances and more comebacks than Donald Trump. And Katie, this is not about Craig. All right? You're not fooling me for a minute. Katie: What? Henry: You are not doing this because you want to be Jennifer's buddy. And this is not so you can be a good little sister to Craig. This is about Mike. Katie: This is so not about -- yeah. This is about Mike.
Katie: Me wanting to know about Jennifer's baby is about Mike. But not in the way that you think. Henry: How's that? Katie: It's not like I want him to get rid of Jennifer so I can have him. I just don't want him to be played for a fool. Again. Henry: And it's -- and it's your job to make sure it doesn't happen again. Katie: Yes. As Mike's friend. Henry, it's not just me. This is a pattern with him. Women don't treat him very well. [ Henry scoffs ] and he's been through this baby thing before. Remember Carly? For months he hung out, hoping and praying that sage was his. And I was there for that, Henry. I saw how bad it hurt him. I saw what he went through. Henry: No one lied to him, though. He knew what was going on. And Jennifer, I'm sure, has been honest with him too. Katie: Let's hope. Henry: She has given you no reason to think otherwise. Katie: Yet. What if Jennifer has the baby and let's Mike think it's his when it really is Craig's? Henry: Oh, come on! Come on. She is incapable of living with that kind of lie. Katie: You don't know that. Henry: If she is capable of telling him that she slept with Craig, she is certainly capable of telling him about a baby. All right? Let it go! Don't any of these periodicals have a sports section in them? Katie: I guess this means "subject closed." Henry: I just -- I need to see who's at the track today. Katie: So you think Mike and Jennifer can figure this out on their own? Henry: I do. Katie: Did we just have a fight? 'Cause this is too weird. You're mad at me. Henry: Kat -- I love you. Bubbles. And I want -- you know what? I want to think about you. I want to think about us. And I don't understand why you have this uncontrollable urge to get all mixed up in the business of Mike and Jennifer. Katie: I told you -- Henry: No. I know, you told me. And there's not a single fact in there that I can believe. So I wonder. Craig is a grown man. He can take care of himself. Besides which, we still don't know if Jennifer is pregnant, let alone if there is a problem. Would you get a hobby, sweetheart? Katie: You already have martinis and gambling. What's left? Online trading? Henry: Well, that could be dangerous. Katie: Knitting? Henry: Knitting? That's better. If you -- if you ever knit any kind of, like, woodland creatures, cute little things, I'm out the door. Katie: Deal. Domestic pets only. Henry: Come here. Katie: Fighting with you bites. Let's not do it again. Henry: Totally bites. Katie: Totally. Henry: We can start making up, right here, right now. What do you say? [ Phone rings ] ah. Henry Coleman. Yeah. Ah, sure, I can be there in 20 minutes. Okay. That's the dispatcher for the limousine service. Katie: Go ahead. I'm fine. Henry: You're sure? Katie: Uh-hmm. I'll meet you at the gym later, okay? Henry: Okay. Katie: No. Henry's right -- it is Jennifer and Mike's business.
Katie: Thank you, fate. Henry's right. I was not meant to know. Nurse: Mrs. Coleman? You can come in now. Katie: Thanks. Nurse: There's a gown on the table. So why don't you go ahead and get undressed. And the doctor will be right in. Katie: Okay. Thank you. Oh, you forgot something. Nurse: What? Katie: You cannot leave these in here.
Nurse: Dr. Schiller does her chart work in here. She needs to review the histories, so she can make some notes. Katie: I just don't want anyone else's information in here. You know, in case, mine gets mixed up with theirs. Nurse: Don't worry. They're not gonna mix you up. I'll just put them over here, and they'll be out of your way. Katie: Don't say I didn't warn you.
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