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Monday, May 10, 2004 The show opens in Deerbrook Hospital where Katie has been committed. She is sitting calmly on the couch, wearing sweats. Nurse Rockwell announces a visitor and it's Henry, carrying a gift bag. "Hey, bubbles. How you doing?" he says. Katie says she's fine, it's very peaceful. "Margo called me to come down here. You know, she's bought the whole wacko routine. She thinks you actually lost it," laughs Henry. Katie says Margo is a good sister, who's just worried because she loves her. "Yeah. You know, it's just you and me, Katie. You can rise from the night of the living dead, all right?" says Henry worriedly. "So - so, what do we do? What's next? What's the plan?" he asks. "We're making lanyards in arts and crafts. Tell me your favorite color, and I'll make you one," says Katie sweetly. Confused, Henry asks if the place is bugged, then wonders if she's really snapped. "Pilar won round one. This is a championship fight here, Katie. All right? This is 12 rounds, and may the best babe win," Henry encourages her. Katie says she doesn't have the strength to fight anymore. "Yes, you - yes, you do. You are Katie Peretti Frasier, nearly Kasnoff. You - you have the power of the Hoover Dam. What are - mm, what are they - yeah. This is what they're doing. They're putting something in your mashed potatoes that's making you abandon all hope," deduces Henry. "It's not about the food, Henry. It's about me. I just want to stay here and be quiet," says Katie. "Well, you can't! Okay, you can't, okay? Because with you in here, my life is - have you - have you ever watched fish in a tank?" asks Henry. "Without you in my life, I'm the stupid little diver at the bottom, okay? I've got nowhere to go. I've got nothing to do. I'm just - I'm looking at the world through a haze of algaes," says Henry forlornly. "Well, think of it this way, Henry. Without me around, you won't get in trouble," says Katie. "Well, what am I supposed to do? Start a stamp collection? Get a job? C'mon - c'mon, Katie. Hey. Hey, hey, please, please. Please don't do this to me," begs Henry. "I'm not doing this to you, Henry. I just realized something today, and it's changed the way I think about everything," says Katie. "Well, forget it! Okay, whatever you've realized, it's a mistake. And you just - you just stay away from the mashed potatoes, okay? You can get your carbs somewhere else," says Henry loudly. Everyone in the room looks at them and Katie shushes him and explains, "I tried to save Mike, but he doesn't want to be saved. Which means that sooner or later, Pilar will get him, so there won't be any Mike. And if there's not any Mike, then what the hell does it matter where I am?" Nurse Rockwell comes in, puts a hand firmly on Henry's shoulder, and announces that visiting hours are over. "I'm practically out the door," Henry assures her. "Oh, I - you know what? I got you a gift. I thought that this might make you laugh," he says, pulling a beanie out of the bag. "I don't know, Henry. There's not much funny about this place," says Katie. "Well, that's their problem, not yours. There is nothing wrong with you. Nothing. You are a perfectly normal, slightly eccentric, impulsive, reckless - okay, normal is a stretch, but there is no reason for you to be in here," says Henry. Katie asks him to feed Snickers. "You're not going to be in here that long. 30 days? 30 days, I've spent that much time on the same bar stool," jokes Henry. Katie says she has to go, and leaves the room. Nurse Rockwell walks up to a confused Henry and says, "Excuse me?" "Yeah, okay, I'm going. All right? You don't have to twist my arm. This place isn't exactly a party waiting to happen," says Henry. The nurse explains that she merely wanted to tell him that since Katie was not committed voluntarily, she has to stay there until she's able to function in society. "Well, who is supposed to be the judge of that? Okay, who can I talk to about this?" asks Henry. Nurse Rockwell says he can make an appointment with her doctors, but he has to leave now. "Okay, all right. Just watch my dust. Okay?" he says. "You better move it, cutie. Nurse Rockwell is tougher than last week's brisket," warns one of the patients. "Yeah, well, she doesn't scare me. I'm not going to let my friend stay in here by herself," declares Henry. One of the patients is standing at attention and saluting Henry. "Okay. Right. Okay, no, no, no. That's okay. That's okay. That's good. At ease. Good. Very good. Looking good, soldier. Why don't you take the night off? Or not. If you - it's up to you," stammers Henry. The nurse comes in and tells Henry again that visiting hours are over. "He's the leader, Nurse Rockwell. And he's come with the code," says the patient. Henry tells her he's waiting for Katie to go over a few more things. "We're locking down the ward in 15 minutes. If you're not out of here by then..." warns the nurse. "Whoa, whoa, wait. I'm sorry. Wait a second. 'Locking down?' As in, steel doors slamming shut? Some guy with a harmonica singing the blues?" asks Henry. Nurse Rockwell says it just means shutting down the ward for the night. "Okay, not for my Katie, all right? Not for my Katie. I'm getting her out of here, because all of you people are..." he says, gesturing that they're crazy. The nurse threatens to call security and Henry grabs her arm. "No, no, no, no, no. Wait, wait, listen. Listen, I have to see Katie. I have to see Katie. It's a matter of life and death," he says. "She's got the pills. The ones that make me invisible," he says crazily as he grabs her collar. "Of course! That's how you get to the mother ship! He is Captain Destiny, Nurse Rockwell. You must obey him," says the crazy patient. "Well, is that a fact? Are you really from another planet?" asks the nurse. "You must not question the leader. Bring me Katie, or my armies will attack," warns Henry. She assures him she'll get Katie, but instead she calls security. "Now, you just, you make yourself comfortable, Captain Destiny," she says as she leads him to the couch. "We're gonna get those little pills of yours and everything's gonna be just fine." "Pills. Good," mutters Henry. Katie comes back into the room to find Henry still there, but changed into hospital clothes. She asks him what he's doing there, and he answers, "I'm pretending to be invisible." "Well, you're not doing a very good job of it. Come on. We got to get you out of here before somebody sees you," says Katie. Henry shushes her and says it's OK, "I'm now an official resident of this fine institution." "You had yourself committed? Why?" she asks. "Well, I couldn't get you out, so I got myself in. And by the way, you need to refer to me as Captain Destiny. Okay?" says Henry. "Henry, I love you," says Katie, hugging him. Today’s episode was directed by Christopher Goutman and written by Craig Heller.
Transcripts from TVMegasite Nurse Rockwell: Katie? You have a visitor. Katie: Hi, Henry. Henry: Hey, bubbles. How you doing? Katie: I'm all right. This place is very peaceful. Nurse Rockwell: Visiting hours will be ending soon. Mr. Wellington, time for your dance therapy. [ Henry clears his throat ] Henry: Margo called me to come down here. You know, she's bought the whole wacko routine. She thinks you actually lost it. Katie: Margo's a good sister. Henry: Mm-hmm. Katie: She worries because she loves me. Henry: Yeah. You know, it's just you and me, Katie. You can rise from the night of the living dead, all right? So -- so, what do we do? What's next? What's the plan? Katie: We're making lanyards in arts and crafts. Tell me your favorite color, and I'll make you one. Henry: Is this -- is this place bugged? Is that why you're acting like this? Katie: Acting like what? Henry: Well, like you've really -- oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. Katie, don't -- don't tell me you've actually snapped.
Henry: Pilar won round one. This is a championship fight here, Katie. All right? This is 12 rounds, and may the best babe win. Katie: I'm not into fighting anymore, Henry. I just don't have the strength. Henry: Yes, you -- yes, you do. You are Katie Peretti Frasier, nearly Kasnoff. You -- you have the power of the Hoover Dam. What are -- mm, what are they -- yeah. This is what they're doing. They're putting something in your mashed potatoes that's making you abandon all hope. Katie: It's not about the food, Henry. It's about me. I just want to stay here and be quiet. Henry: Well, you can't! Okay, you can't, okay? Because with you in here, my life is -- have you -- have you ever watched fish in a tank? Katie: Sure. Henry: Okay. Okay, without you in my life, I'm the stupid little diver at the bottom, okay? I've got nowhere to go. I've got nothing to do. I'm just -- I'm looking at the world through a haze of algaes. Katie: Well, think of it this way, Henry. Without me around, you won't get in trouble. Henry: Well, what am I supposed to do? Start a stamp collection? Get a job? C'mon -- c'mon, Katie. Hey. Hey, hey, please, please. Please don't do this to me. Katie: I'm not doing this to you, Henry. I just realized something today, and it's changed the way I think about everything. Henry: Well, forget it! Okay, whatever you've realized, it's a mistake. And you just -- you just stay away from the mashed potatoes, okay? You can get your carbs somewhere else. Katie: Shh -- would you just listen? I tried to save Mike, but he doesn't want to be saved. Which means that sooner or later, Pilar will get him, so there won't be any Mike. And if there's not any Mike, then what the hell does it matter where I am?
Nurse Rockwell: Visiting hours are over. You're going to have to say good-bye. Henry: I'm practically out the door. Oh, I -- you know what? I got you a gift. I thought that this might make you laugh. Katie: I don't know, Henry. There's not much funny about this place. Henry: Well, that's their problem, not yours. There is nothing wrong with you. Nothing. You are a perfectly normal, slightly eccentric, impulsive, reckless -- okay, normal is a stretch, but there is no reason for you to be in here. Katie: Oh, will you feed snickers, and make sure he doesn't forget me? Henry: You're not going to be in here that long. 30 days? 30 days, I've spent that much time on the same bar stool. Katie: I got to go. It was good to see you. Nurse Rockwell: Excuse me? Henry: Yeah, okay, I'm going. All right? You don't have to twist my arm. This place isn't exactly a party waiting to happen. Nurse Rockwell: No, it's not that. I heard what you said to Ms. Frasier about her being here for 30 days. Henry: Yeah, what about it? Nurse Rockwell: The 30-day limit is only if the patient's commitment is voluntary. That's not the case with Ms. Frasier. She's going to have to be here until she's healthy enough to function in society. Henry: Well, who is supposed to be the judge of that? Okay, who can I talk to about this? Nurse Rockwell: Well, I'm sure that her doctors would be happy to meet with you, but you're going to have to make the appointment for another time. All visitors must be off the premises immediately. Henry: Okay, all right. Just watch my dust. Okay? Nurse Rockwell: Thank you. Female patient: You better move it, cutie. Nurse Rockwell is tougher than last week's brisket. Henry: Yeah, well, she doesn't scare me. I'm not going to let my friend stay in here by herself.
Henry: Okay. Right. Okay, no, no, no. That's okay. That's okay. That's good. At ease. Good. Very good. Looking good, soldier. Why don't you take the night off? Or not. If you -- it's up to you. Nurse Rockwell: Excuse me, sir, I thought I made it very clear that visiting hours are over. Man: He's the leader, Nurse Rockwell. And he's come with the code. Henry: Okay, actually, actually, I'm just waiting for Katie, because there's just a couple more things that we have to go over. Nurse Rockwell: We're locking down the ward in 15 minutes. If you're not out of here by then -- Henry: Whoa, whoa, wait. I'm sorry. Wait a second. "Locking down"? As in, steel doors slamming shut? Some guy with a harmonica singing the blues? Nurse Rockwell: Lockdown is simply a term for shutting down the ward at night. Henry: Okay, not for my Katie, all right? Not for my Katie. I'm getting her out of here, because all of you people are -- [ Henry whistles ] Okay? No offense there, okay? Nurse Rockwell: I'm calling security. Henry: No, no, no, no, no. Wait, wait, listen. Listen, I have to see Katie. I have to see Katie. It's a matter of life and death. Nurse Rockwell: Life and death? Henry: Yes, because she's got the pills. The ones that make me invisible. Man: Of course! That's how you get to the mother ship! He is Captain Destiny, Nurse Rockwell. You must obey him. Nurse Rockwell: Well, is that a fact? Are you really from another planet? Henry: You must not question the leader. Bring me Katie, or my armies will attack. Nurse Rockwell: Well, we certainly wouldn't want that. I will get her down here right away. I need security in the day room. Now, you just, you make yourself comfortable, Captain Destiny. Henry: All right. Nurse Rockwell: We're gonna get those little pills of yours and everything's gonna be just fine. Henry: Pills. Good.
Katie: Henry, what are you still doing here? Henry: I'm pretending to be invisible. Katie: Well, you're not doing a very good job of it. Come on. We got to get you out of here before somebody sees you. Henry: Katie, Katie, Katie, shh, shh. It's okay. I'm now an official resident of this fine institution. Katie: You had yourself committed? Why? Henry: Well, I couldn't get you out, so I got myself in. And by the way, you need to refer to me as Captain Destiny. Okay? Katie: Henry, I love you.
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