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Tuesday, May 20, 2003 The jail cell saga with Henry, Jack, Craig, Rose and Emily as inmates continues. Margo arrives to take over for D.A. Evelyn. "Oh, thanks, Detective. Everyone, I'll be back with a court date," she says. "Good luck with that," quips Henry. Margo is confused and dismayed to see them all behind bars. "Let's just say each and every one of us, at one time or another, thought that kidnapping Barbara Ryan sounded really peachy," explains Emily. Craig begs his sister Margo to let him see Rosanna for a few minutes; he wants to ask her to talk Barbara out of pressing charges. "What's she gonna do? Give Barbara a frontal lobotomy?" scoffs Margo. "No, that would be redundant. But Rosanna is the one who can fix this. Free Jack - free your good buddy Jack and we can all go about our lives. What do you say, sis?" asks Craig. Before Margo can answer Jack asks her about Carly. He's worried about her with the stress of the last few days. He's also upset with himself that he didn't trust her. Margo says she'll see what she can do, and slips him a cell phone so he can call her himself. "Thank you. I just gotta figure out what to say," says Jack. "Margo, Margo, Margo -- the sooner you release me, the sooner Jack can slander me in the privacy of his own home," continues Craig. Margo gives him and leads him upstairs to talk to Rosanna. Jack tries calling Carly but is unable to get ahold of her. He leaves a message on the machine at Hal's house, thinking she might be there to visit Parker. He's right; she hears the whole thing but doesn't pick up the phone. Disappointed, Jack turns off the cell phone. "You know, Carly probably just has a lot on her mind right now. You know how it goes. I'm sure she's getting..." says Henry, trying to comfort him. "Shut up, Coleman. Shut up. You got me in this mess. And you know what? You're gonna get me out of it," says Jack. Henry wonders how he's going to do that. "Well, you're gonna have an - you're gonna have an epiphany all over the place about how a con man like you ended up hiding out in my house. And you know what? It's gonna make a lot of sense," suggests Jack. "You broke into my house when nobody was home, and you hid in my basement. And nobody knew you were there, Henry," explains Jack. "Yeah. And then you caught me and told me I could stay," says Henry. "No, Henry, that never happened. See, that's the part you dreamed up - hallucination. You wanted it to be that way, but it wasn't," says Jack. "Yeah. Yeah, okay. And then what are we supposed to tell everybody now that I've already sold them... " wonders Henry. "Tell everybody this because you owe Carly. You made her life a living hell when you blackmailed her. One way of paying her back. For once in your God-forsaken life, do the wrong thing for all the right reasons, would you? Your future depends on it," says Jack. Moved (or frightened), Henry calls for the guard. "Hello? Hello? Officer, somebody? I'm having an epiphany. A big one. Detective Snyder should be released immediately," says Henry. "The truth is, I lied. I lie all the time, okay? It's common knowledge. But this time, this time, I am telling the truth. I was in Jack's basement, but Jack didn't know. He had no idea. No one did," confesses Henry. Hal asks how he did that. "Easy," answers Henry. "You know, this poor guy, he works his tail off. He's never around. So I just waited until it got quiet upstairs, and then I - I went up. I raided the refrigerator, I ordered some pizza, I ate it in the broom closet. It was a miserable existence. But I figured that if the cops are trying to get me, right, the best way to avoid them was to be right under the nose of Oakdale's finest. Right?" he says, turning to Jack for confirmation. "I mean, as if - as if he would know," says Henry. Hal asks Henry why he lied about being Jack's houseguest. "Because that's what I do. Haven't we already been over this?" says Henry. Hal agrees that if Henry is recanting his story, there's no reason for Jack to stay in jail. Hal lets Jack out of the cell and Jack thanks him, promising to return as soon as he finds Carly. Hal suggests he use the back door. Emily and Rose call after him, wishing him good luck with Carly. "Tell her to make a cake with a file in it!" says Rose, only half joking. Meanwhile, Craig's plea for help was turned down by his current wife and his ex-wife. He is led back to the cell, defeated. Rose asks how it went and Craig says they had a difference of opinion. "Ladies and gentlemen, I may have lost the battle, but I shall continue to fight the good fight. What's going on here? Where's Jack?" "Oh, they let him go. The D.A. doesn't know," answers Henry, patting the bed that has been stuffed with pillows. "What? I thought it was justice for all, or justice for none," says Craig. "Well, my vote is for the latter," says Henry. "Jack had a little business to take care of. And you say anything, anything, I'll make you pay. You hear me?" threatens Rose. Just then Evelyn comes back and they all hush up and pretend Jack is still there. Evelyn announces that the arraignment has been scheduled for 10 the next morning. "I'll be sure to inform my secretary," remarks Henry. Craig tries to bargain with the D.A. "Ms. Hart, I know that these arrests have been as embarrassing to law enforcement as they have been to me and my friends. You know the four of us are very well-connected in this town," he says. Evelyn is not impressed. Craig suggests they handle this matter in a "more private and humane manner." He asks what would happen if Barbara dropped the charges. Evelyn says they would still prosecute, but admits their case would be weakened. Craig asks if she would consider dropping the case if he convinced Barbara not to press charges, "To spare the D.A.'s office and the Oakdale PD the public humiliation." Evelyn says she would agree to it if Barbara comes to her before the arraignment. "But I wouldn't waste my breath if I were you. You have a better shot at making pigs fly," says Evelyn as she leaves. "I thought she'd never leave," says Henry, relieved. "At least she didn't notice that the lump of blanket isn't Jack. Maybe I'll have some luck with Barbara," says Craig hopefully. Hal tells him he doesn't stand a chance. Craig agrees, but says he knows someone who does. He asks Margo for his phone call; he wants to call Marshall Travers. Today’s episode was directed by Maria Wagner and written by Lynn Martin.
Transcripts from TVMegaSite Craig: Ms. Hart -- Ms. Hart, just a second, please. Uh, I need you to contact my wife. I need to see her now. I think she's still upstairs. And if you'll let me talk to her for just a little while, can straighten this whole mess out. Margo: Okay, I'll take it from here. Evelyn: Oh, thanks, Detective. Everyone, I'll be back with a court date. Henry: Good luck with that. Margo: Jack? Jack: Long story. I'll tell you all about it. Emily: Let's just say each and every one of us, at one time or another, thought that kidnapping Barbara Ryan sounded really peachy. Margo: So you were all involved? Rose: At varying times, varying degrees. Craig: Margo, is Rosanna still upstairs? Margo: Oh yeah, raising hell. What else is new? Craig: Well, I can clean this whole thing up with her if you let me see her for five minutes. Margo: Really? How you plan on doing that? Craig: Rosanna. [ Margo scoffs ] Margo: What's she gonna do? Give Barbara a frontal lobotomy? Craig: No, that would be redundant. But Rosanna is the one who can fix this. Free Jack -- free your good buddy Jack and we can all go about our lives. What do you say, sis?
Craig: Margo, just give me five minutes -- Jack: Margo? Margo: Yeah? Jack: I'm worried about Carly. Margo: What, the baby? Jack: The baby, her heart, her mind. Barbara went nuts at the fashion show, accused Carly of stealing her ideas. Margo: Did she have any basis for that? Jack: No. The only thing she did wrong was trust her partner. Margo: All right, all right, all right. Jack: I didn't get it. Not at first. I didn't trust her, Margo. I let -- I let her down. Margo: Hey, I'm sure that Carly understands. Jack: No, why should she? She might lose her career. And the stress -- if she loses the baby -- Margo: You know what? Jack: I just gotta know she's all right. Margo: All right, all right, all right. I'm gonna see what I can do. In the meantime, why don't you see if you can get ahold of her first. Jack: Thank you. I just gotta figure out what to say. Craig: Margo, Margo, Margo -- the sooner you release me, the sooner Jack can slander me in the privacy of his own home. Margo: All right, all right. Come on, let's go. Craig: All right. Five minutes to freedom. Margo: Just come on.
Henry: You know, Carly probably just has a lot on her mind right now. You know how it goes. I'm sure she's getting -- Jack: Shut up, Coleman. Shut up. You got me in this mess. And you know what? You're gonna get me out of it. Henry: Am I? Jack: Yeah, you are. Henry: Now how -- how am I going to achieve that? Jack: Well, you're gonna have an -- you're gonna have an epiphany all over the place about how a con man like you ended up hiding out in my house. And you know what? It's gonna make a lot of sense.
Jack: You broke into my house when nobody was home, and you hid in my basement. And nobody knew you were there, Henry. Henry: Yeah. And then you caught me and told me I could stay. Jack: No, Henry, that never happened. See, that's the part you dreamed up -- hallucination. You wanted it to be that way, but it wasn't. Henry: Yeah. Yeah, okay. And then what are we supposed to tell everybody now that I've already sold them -- Jack: Tell everybody this because you owe Carly. You made her life a living hell when you blackmailed her. One way of paying her back. For once in your god forsaken life, do the wrong thing for all the right reasons, would you? Your future depends on it. Henry: Hello? Hello? Officer, somebody? I'm having an epiphany. A big one. Detective Snyder should be released immediately.
Henry: The truth is, I lied. I lie all the time, okay? It's common knowledge. But this time -- this time, I am telling the truth. I was in Jack's basement, but Jack didn't know. He had no idea. No one did. Hal: How'd you manage that? Henry: Easy. You know, this poor guy, he works his tail off. He's never around. So I just waited until it got quiet upstairs, and then I -- I went up. I raided the refrigerator, I ordered some pizza, I ate it in the broom closet. It was a miserable existence. But I figured that if the cops are trying to get me, right, the best way to avoid them was to be right under the nose of Oakdale's finest. Right? I mean, as if -- as if he would know. Hal: Tell me, why would you say that you're staying at Jack's with his permission if that was a lie? Henry: Because that's what I do. Haven't we already been over this? Hal: Okay. Well, if you're recanting your story, then I don't see any reason why Jack has to stay in there. So why don't you just go ahead and open up the cage? Jack: Thanks. Hal, listen, as soon as I find Carly and straighten this whole thing out, I'll come back and take the flack for this. I've already made some admissions to the D.A., All right? Hal: Whoa -- why don't you go out the backdoor? Jack: All right. Thanks a lot. Emily: Good luck with, Carly! Rose: Tell her to make a cake with a file in it!
Rose: How'd it go with the latest wife? Craig: We had a difference of opinion. Emily: Oh, please. Rose: What happened to the fabled Montgomery charm? Craig: Ladies and gentlemen, I may have lost the battle, but I shall continue to fight the good fight. What's going on here? Where's Jack? Henry: Oh, they let him go. The D.A. doesn't know. Craig: What? I thought it was justice for all, or justice for none. Henry: Well, my vote is for the latter. Rose: Jack had a little business to take care of. And you say anything, anything, I'll make you pay. You hear me? Hal: Shh, Rose. D.A. Emily: Montgomery, just don't say anything stupid for once in your life. Evelyn: Ladies and gentlemen, your arraignment has been scheduled for tomorrow morning at 10:00 a.m. Henry: I'll be sure to inform my secretary. Hal: Thank you. Craig: Ms. Hart, I know that these arrests have been as embarrassing to law enforcement as they have been to me and my friends. You know the four of us are very well-connected in this town. Evelyn: Oh, well, congratulations. Craig: And since we all want to see justice served, I think we could handle this matter in a more private and humane manner. Evelyn: Meaning? Craig: What would happen if Barbara Ryan dropped the charges? Hal: The state would still prosecute. Craig: Yeah, but the case would lose its legs if the injured party changed her mind, correct? Evelyn: Perhaps. Craig: Well, Ms. Hart, if you have a minute, I have a proposition for the prosecution that might interest you.
Craig: All right, now, the arraignments are scheduled for when? Evelyn: 10:00 tomorrow morning. Craig: All right. If I can convince Barbara Ryan to drop the charges before we go before the judge, would you consider dropping the case? Evelyn: And why would I do that, Mr. Montgomery? Craig: Well, to spare the D.A.'s office and the Oakdale pd the public humiliation. Evelyn: Well, if Barbara Ryan comes to me before 10:00 tomorrow morning and wants to drop the charges, I'll consider the case closed. Craig: That's all I ask. Evelyn: But I wouldn't waste my breath if I were you. You have a better shot at making pigs fly. Henry: I thought she'd never leave. Craig: At least she didn't notice that the lump of blanket isn't Jack. Maybe I'll have some luck with Barbara. Hal: Forget it. You don't stand a chance. Craig: Maybe not, but there is someone who does. Margo? I think I'm ready to make that call. Margo: Not to Barbara? Craig: No. No. Marshall Travers.
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