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Monday, July 5, 2010

Henry and Vienna are married at Al's Diner, and no one is there to stop them.  Katie is upset that Vienna didn't tell Henry she isn't really pregnant, and Vienna is desperate to keep him from finding out the truth.

Today’s episode was directed by Michael Eilbaum and written by Leslie Nipkow.


Transcripts from TVMegasite

Josiah: Speak now or forever hold your peace.

Paul: If you want to make a break for it, now is the time.

Josiah: So no one's gonna speak now?

Vienna: No, of course not. Why would they?

Josiah: Well, then, there's no logical reason to waste any more time. Who's got the rings?

Henry: The rings?

Vienna: Yeah, you did get the rings, didn't you?

Henry: Yes, I -- I technically was -- yes. Of course I -- I got the rings. I -- right. The rings. Thank you. I -- I didn't know where they were exactly. I couldn't remember where I had put them.

Paul: Right. You couldn't remember because you had about 20 bottles of champagne.

Henry: Right.

Chris: His head looks like it's going to explode.

Katie: That's not unusual.

Chris: Mm.

Henry: Which is which?

Paul: Yours is the big one?

Henry: The big one. The big one, 'cause I'm the man, right? 'Cause I'm manning up. Right. Got it.

Paul: Yes, you are. You're the man. And all you've got to do now is repeat after First Officer Crock.

Henry: Okay.

Vienna: Okay, you can go on. We're ready now.

Josiah: Henry, please place the ring on Vienna's finger and repeat after me. "I give you this ring as a symbol of my endless love and commitment to you."

Henry: I give you this ring as a --

Josiah: "Symbol."

Henry: As a symbol --

Paul: You know what? Um, my brother's really nervous, so maybe you could make what he has to say just a little shorter.

Josiah: Right. Got it. "As a symbol of my endless love."

Henry: As a symbol of my endless love.

Josiah: "And commitment."

Henry: And commitment.

Josiah: "To you."

Henry: To you.

Josiah: Vienna.

Henry: Ow. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

Paul: Take it easy on him.

Henry: Its okay, it's okay. It's close enough. It works. It's legit.

Josiah: Repeat after me. "I give you this ring."

Vienna: I give you this ring as a symbol of my commitment and endless love for you.

Josiah: Henry, my friend, the time has arrived. Do you take this woman to be your wife?


Josiah: Henry, do you take this woman to --

Henry: I do.

Bob: Talk about a cliffhanger.

Kim: I can't believe it. I thought for sure Barbara would come crashing through that door and end everything.

[Henry sighs]

Bob: I get the distinct impression that that's what Henry was hoping for.

Kim: Well, it's not too late. They're not man and wife yet.

Josiah: Vienna, do you take this man to be your husband?

Vienna: I do.

Josiah: Then by the powers vested in me by the worldwide web --

Vienna: No, wait!


Henry: The wedding's almost over. Why are you stopping it now?

Vienna: No, I'm not stopping it. I'm adding to it. This is our wedding day, Henry. I want there to be more to it than -- than just a ceremony from the internet.

Josiah: I thought you didn't want the deluxe version.

Paul: Oh, please, dear God, no.

Vienna: No. What you did was fine. But I wrote my own vows. There's so much I want to say to you.

Paul: They're single-spaced.

Vienna: So, these are just my notes. I wrote them down in case I got nervous and I forgot what I wanted to say.

Chris: How many different ways can you say, "I'm sorry I faked being pregnant to get you to marry me"?

Katie: Maybe Henry forgave her. He doesn't look too upset.

Chris: No, he looks insane. And I'm sorry, that's just the way he looks. Something's not right.

Katie: We knew that when we got here.

Vienna: I am overjoyed to be here with you, my love, getting married with all our friends around us to support us. And I know that some of you may have questions about the path of how Henry and I came to this moment, but I have no doubt about what we're doing. Love isn't always fair, but love really does conquer all. And forgiveness -- forgiveness is even more powerful. I have always loved you, Henry. And the fact that you've forgiven me for all my silly, stupid mistakes makes me even love you more.

Chris: I'm sure she told him, but what is that baby bump all about?

Katie: I don't know. Maybe she just didn't want to have to explain it to everybody else.

Chris: I don't know how Henry could be okay with this. There's no way, no way I'd do it.

Katie: I don't know how he could be okay with it either.

Vienna: I love you, Henry, and I'm going to try to be the best wife I can. That's all. I just wanted you to know how I feel.

Paul: It's your turn.

Henry: Vows? I didn't -- I didn't write any vow -- we never talked about any vows.

Vienna: No, no, but just speak from your heart, Henry.

Paul: Come on, Henry. You're never at a loss for words.

Henry: Yeah. There's always a first time for everything.

Paul: Not -- not now. This is not that time. This is man-up time, remember? It's man-up time.

Henry: It's man-up time. Yeah. Man up. I -- if I speak from the heart, the words will come to me, right? What a long, strange trip it's been. It's been very strange. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one.

Vienna: Henry, your heart.

Henry: The heart. Yes, heart.

Vienna: The heart.

Henry: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Man up. I, um -- we wouldn't have gotten here alone. Somebody else brought us together -- our baby -- our little boy or a girl who's staying up here with us right now. We're not normal people. We're not conventional people. And -- and if we were, we never would have found each other, and we would never be here, on the verge of wedded bliss, and not just as a husband/wife, but as a family, as -- as a mother and a father and a child. And I promise -- I promise I will spend the rest of my life making our child proud to have me as a father and you proud to have me as a husband. I swear it. That's my vow.

Vienna: I think we're ready now.

Josiah: What God, the galaxies and have joined together, let no man put asunder.

Kim: Or woman.

Bob: You feel bad for Barbara, don't you?

Josiah: I now pronounce you husband and wife. You know what comes next.


Emily: Congratulations for not hyperventilating during your vows.

Henry: Oh, oh, yeah. I came prepared just in case.

[Emily chuckles]

Henry: Please stop looking at the door. I was sure that Barbara would show up and stop the wedding.

Paul: Yeah. I was surprised, too. I wonder what happened to her?

Emily: Oh, for God's sake, why are we still discussing her? We should just be happy she didn't show up. And let's just hope she's gone.

Paul: Gone where?

Emily: Can we get some champagne, really, because this was the most nerve-racking wedding I think I've ever been to, and that includes ours.

Henry: She was held at gunpoint at her sister's wedding. How could today be any worse?

Paul: I don't know. I wasn't really listening. Welcome to married life. Pretty much all you do is say "Yes, Dear."

Chris: So, you gonna talk to Vienna about not telling Henry the truth?

Katie: You bet I am.


Vienna: Thank you for being here.

Katie: I wouldn't miss it.

Vienna: Isn't it wonderful? Henry and I -- we are so happy. Here. You should hug him. Yeah, I'm sure you guys have a lot to talk about.

Katie: Uh, Henry and I can chat later. I'd like a private moment with the bride.


Katie: Vienna, I really need to talk to you.

Henry: Go! I'll be fine.

Vienna: Katie, I really don't feel comfortable leaving.

Katie: We'll just be right over there.

Vienna: Katie, please, I -- whatever you have to say can wait.

Katie: No, it can't. But if you want me to say it in front of everyone, I don't mind?

Vienna: Okay, fine, fine. Fine.

Katie: Excuse us.

Henry: Sure.

Katie: What are you doing?

Vienna: I'm trying to enjoy my wedding.

Katie: That is not what I'm talking about, and you know it.

Vienna: Katie, please.

Katie: I can't believe you. How could you not tell Henry?

Henry: Tell Henry what?

Vienna: Henry, Darling, I didn't want you to know about earlier today. Before the ceremony, I suddenly got a terrible case of cold feet.

Katie: Vienna, don't do this.

Vienna: No, Katie, it's okay. I know you're a friend. You're my best friend. But Henry -- he's my husband, and I -- I don't want there to be any secrets between us.

Katie: That sounds like a very good plan.

Henry: Well, it's -- so, everybody gets cold feet. It doesn't matter. We're married now.

Vienna: I don't know why I got so frightened.

Katie: Maybe there was an underlying reason.

Vienna: Well, you know that there was. It's about the baby.

Katie: Go on.

Vienna: I was worried that you married me just because I got pregnant and that tomorrow, when you wake up, you would feel trapped and resent me.

Henry: No, oh -- Vienna, no.

Vienna: So, early this morning, I went to church to pray to Santa Lucia for her guidance.

Katie: Vienna --

Vienna: No, Katie, it's okay. I want you to hear this. [Sighs] Santa Lucia -- she spoke to me, and she said that no matter how we got here and whatever mistakes we've made on the way, once we get married, it'll erase all that. She said that we owe it to each other and our child to get married and make it work for the rest of our life, no matter what happens. And that's what God wants. Amen.


Katie: Vienna, you should be ashamed of yourself.

Henry: Bubbles --

Katie: This is outrageous! Did you hear what she just said?

Henry: Uh, which -- which part?

Katie: The part about this being part of God's plan. I'm sorry. God had nothing to do with this. This is 100% Vienna --

Chris: Okay, let's dial it back a little bit, okay?

Katie: What are you talking about? I didn't do this. I'm the only one who's being honest here.

Vienna: I don't know what you're talking about.

Katie: Stop lying, Vienna.

Henry: Bubbles, what has got you so -- I don't understand.

Chris: It's just her blood sugar, I'm sure.

Katie: Please don't make excuses for me.

Chris: I have not seen you eat a thing, all right? You know how you get when you're hungry. We're gonna go get air and eat a cookie. Come on. Let's walk.

Vienna: I have no idea why she would say those things.

Henry: Yeah, or why he would take her outside when all the food is in here.

Vienna: No, he'll calm her down. Just forget about it.

Henry: Uh, she's probably thinking about Brad. I know I was.

Vienna: You were?

Henry: I always thought that Brad and Katie would be our kids' Godparents.

Vienna: You never told me that.

Henry: Yeah, and we talked about it a lot. We talked about everything before you got pregnant the first time and everything went bad. And I just -- I didn't want to jinx it, and I didn't -- and I didn't want to think about Brad not being here when I'm obsessing about being a good dad. And that's what I want. I want to be here for you and for our child.

Vienna: And you are.

Henry: I can be better, and I -- I will be better. I swear to it.

Vienna: I'm so lucky to have you.

Henry: Yeah. I think I should go check on Katie, make sure she's okay.

Vienna: No, no.

Henry: Yeah.

Vienna: No, Chris is out there, and you know how she is. She doesn't want to cause a scene at our wedding.


Henry: [Sniffs] Whoa! What is that? Whoa, did the milk go bad?

Vienna: No. It's an old Swedish remedy -- anti-nausea powder for pregnant women. You know, morning sickness can happen all day long.

Henry: Are you sure? Anything that smells that bad can't possibly be good for you.

Vienna: It's perfectly safe. The women in my family have been using it for centuries. It just -- it smells worse than it tastes. You know, I just want to make sure that our baby is healthy and perfect.

Henry: No, no, no, no, no. Perfect would be too weird. I just want he or she to have matching sets of everything. That's all.

[Both laugh]

Henry: You know what? Hold on. Let me -- let me taste that. You shouldn't have to drink that alone.

Vienna: No, no, no, no, no. That's for girls only. But I love that you want to help.

Henry: Have you been feeling queasy all day?

Vienna: No. It just -- it just started. I'm -- I'm fine. I'm okay. I just -- I can stand anything for our baby.


Paul: Okay, everybody. Time for wedding cake. And, um, my wife just told me that because I'm the best man, I got to make a toast. So everybody grab a glass.

Vienna: Okay. Make sure that there's something in it. Otherwise, it's bad luck.

Paul: Well, we're all here to celebrate Henry and Vienna. May this be the first of many beautiful days, and may they have a long and happy life together. I know I for one am really looking forward to having a new niece or nephew, and, well, Eliza can't wait to have a little cousin to boss around. And, uh, Henry, you're my brother. I got your back. We're a family. Might not be a run-of-the-mill family, but we're family nonetheless. And, Vienna, now that you're my sister, that goes for you, too. So, uh, to all of us, and to this baby, and to Henry and Vienna.

Emily: Hear, hear.

Bob: Hear, hear.

Vienna: Cheers, cheers.


Vienna: Oh, Katie, it seems like you're the only unmarried woman here. Will you catch the bouquet?

Katie: Why don't you just keep it? Besides, I don't think it counts if nobody's fighting for it.

Vienna: Of course it does. Everything counts.

Katie: I don't really want to.

Kim: Come on, Katie. It's not like there's an expiration date.

Katie: Okay, fine. Only so you all stop staring at me.

Vienna: Okay.

Katie: Yay me! Happy now? I'm an unmarried woman.

Chris: Want to get out of here?

Katie: Yeah.

Henry: Bubbles, are you okay?

Katie: Whatever happens, I want you to be happy, okay?

Henry: I am.

Katie: I love you, Henry.

Henry: I love you, too.

Vienna: Thank you, Santa Lucia.


Henry: Wait a second. What are you doing? What are you doing? I want to -- I want to carry you across the threshold.

Vienna: Oh, I appreciate that thought, but I'm not as light as I used to be before the baby.

Henry: No, no, I can handle it. Come here.

Vienna: Okay, just be careful.

Henry: I will. I would never let you fall. You know that. It's amazing. You're as light as a feather considering how pregnant you are.


Henry: You know, I never got any of that cake, and now I'm kind of hungry. Do you want anything from room service?

Vienna: No, no, wait. I'm not ready yet.

Henry: Okay. You want me to just wait here?

Vienna: Yes. Uh, can you just give me one minute? Okay. You can come in now.

Henry: Why are all the lights off?

Vienna: Well, it's our wedding night. I guess I'm feeling a little shy.

Henry: This is nice, actually.

Vienna: [Sighs] This has been the best night of my entire life. Henry?

Henry: Yeah. Me, too. It was the best ever.


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