Message Boards
Home

Thursday, July 11, 2002

Henry and Katie opened the show today.  Katie is looking at the pictures of Simon with the plastic surgeon's markings on them, and says that she's finally found the proof that "Simon" really isn't her husband Simon.  Henry admits that Simon is not bad looking, but can't quite believe that someone would go through the pain of plastic surgery just to look like him.  Katie asks Henry for another explanation for the pictures.  He can't come up with one, but assures her there must be one.  

Katie asks Henry, "Is it cheating if you sleep with someone who got plastic surgery to look just like your husband?"  Henry tells her that it's a good question, they should discuss it on the way to the police station.  Katie says they can't go to the police, they're in Avanya.  "I know, I heard the monkeys screeching on the way in," says Henry.  But he also knows they do have cops.  Katie says it's too risky, the cops have been known to trade information for money, and if the fake Simon finds out they're on to him he'll be gone by morning.  "And?  So?" asks Henry.  Katie is afraid that if that happens, she may never see her husband again.  Henry asks her if she has a Plan B, and she says she's thinking of one.  Suddenly there's a noise of keys at the door, it's faux Simon!  Hiding behind Katie, Henry laments, "I'm gonna die right here in the birthplace of humidity!"

Katie tells Henry to follow her lead, and starts to hit him with her purse as faux Simon walks in.  He tells her she did a good job, and he'll take it from here.  Katie tells Simon that Henry came in and wrecked the place.  Simon asks if he found it, and Henry asks what?  The provenance, of course.  "Cough it up or I'll rearrange your face," threatens Simon as he holds him by the collar.  Henry remarks that that's an interesting choice of words.  Katie asks Simon, "You're not gonna hurt him, are you?"  "Yeah, probably," responds Simon.  

Katie tells him that's so unlike him, he's the one who always says, "A man who resorts to violence is a man who has run out of ideas."  "I said that?" asks Simon.  He lets go of Henry and tells him he's lucky Katie is here.  "That's debatable, but we'll talk about it later," says Henry as he hurries to leave.  He tells them he wants to catch a performance of "Waiting for Lefty" at the Avanya Playhouse.  As he's leaving Simon tells him that if he comes back, he'll be forced to drop his "dandy-like facade" and resort to violence.

That night, Katie and Lucinda try to get the fake Simon drunk so he'll slip up and let on that he's not Simon.  But their plan backfires, and they're the ones who end up drunk!

Today’s episode was directed by Ellen Wheeler and written by Craig Heller.

Transcripts from ATWTweekly

[ Avanya - Simon & Katie's Hotel Room ]
>> Katie: This is it! This is the proof we've been looking for. The reason Simon hasn't been like Simon is because he isn't.
>> Henry: Okay, whoa! Whoa, whoa, hey -- Katie, now, look, I admit Simon's not a bad looking guy, but the idea that someone would go through all the pain of plastic surgery just to look like your husband -- I don't know, c'mon.
>> Katie: All right. Give me some other explanation for these pictures.
>> Henry: Fine. Simon was obviously just -- um, then again he might be --I'll have to get back to you on that one. But there's an explanation out there somewhere, all right?
>> Katie: This is real, Henry. And to think I might -- I might've -- oh, god, is it cheating if you sleep with somebody who got plastic surgery to look just like your husband?
>> Henry: That's a good question. Let's talk about that on the way down to the police station.
>> Katie: Police? No, no, no, no! This is Avanya, Henry.
>> Henry: No kidding! I heard the monkeys screeching on the way in, but I know there are cops here. I saw them drinking in the town square.
>> Katie: No, I'm sorry. It is way too risky. The cops have been known to trade money for information here. And if that fake Simon finds out that we're onto him, he could be gone by morning.
>> Henry: And? So?!
>> Katie: And I may never see my husband again!
>> Henry: Is there a plan "B" here, Katie?
>> Katie: I don't know! I'm thinking of it. Oh, my god, that's him.
>> Henry: Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa -- he's gonna kill us. Oh, my god! I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die right here in the birthplace of humidity.

[ Avanya - Katie& Simon's Hotel Room ]
>> Katie: Okay, just follow whatever I do.
>> Henry : Wait, can you -- [ Katie grunting ] Katie! Stop it! Knock it off!
>> "Simon": Hey, hey, good work, Katie I'll take it from here [talking over each other ] Did you do this to our room?
>> Henry: Wait, wait, wait, wait, could I talk to Katie for just a moment in a private place?
>> Katie: It was him. I walked in had just wrecked this place!
>> Henry: That is not true. That's not true.
>> "Simon": Mouth shut. You understand?
>> Henry: Sure, sure.
>> "Simon": Now, did you find it?
>> Henry: What? What is he talking about?
>> "Simon": The provenance for the rose of Sharon diamond. That's what you were looking for, wasn't it?
>> Katie: Obviously, that is exactly what he was looking for. Isn't it obvious?
>> "Simon": All right. All right, cough it up or I rearrange your face.
>> Henry: You'll rearrange my face? That's very interesting. Funny that you mention that. That's very amusing, don't you think, Katie?
>> Katie: Simon? Sweetheart? Wait, hold on. You're not going to hurt him, are you?
>> "Simon": Yeah, probably.
>> Katie: But that's so unlike you.
>> "Simon": It is?
>> Katie: Yes. You're always the first person to say, "the man resorts to violence is a man who's run out of."
>> "Simon": Oh, I said that?
>> Henry: Yes.
>> "Simon": Yeah, I said that.
>> Henry: Yes,
>> "Simon": All right. You're very lucky she's here.
>> Henry: Yes, yes, that's debatable but we'll talk that later. I gotta go, they're doing a wonderful production of "Waiting for Lefty" down at the Avanya playhouse. I'll talk to you later.
>> "Simon": Hold it. Hold it. I find you back in this room, I drop my dandy-like facade and I resort to violence, you got that?
>> Henry: I got it. I will remember that. Count on it.
>> Katie: Simon, my sweet. I'm so proud of you. Violence would've just been the easy way out.
>> "Simon": I know. I know. I was very Zen. Look what that weasel has done to this room, huh?
>> Katie: I know. I'm so sorry. You know, we'll clean it up together.
>> "Simon": Don't touch a thing.
>> Katie: Why not?
>> "Simon": Because I don't want my woman doing that kind of work. That's why?
>> Katie: Aw -- that is very sweet of you, but really, I don't mind.
>> "Simon": No, no -- okay, here's what you're gonna do -- you're gonna go downstairs, and you're gonna wait for me there.
>> Katie: Okay.
>> "Simon": Mm-hmm.
>> Katie: Why?
>> "Simon": Why? Because I have been ignoring you too much lately. So tonight, we're gonna eat, we're gonna drink -- and maybe even make merry, if you know what I mean. So why don't you go downstairs and get us a table.
>> Katie: I'll do that.
>> "Simon": Yeah. The one by the window, you know I like that one.
>> Katie: See you soon.
>> "Simon": [ after Katie leaves ] No more games, Katie One way or the other, you're gonna tell me where that diamond is.

Previous Recap            Back to Recap Page             Next Recap